2020 – The good. The bad. And everything in between.

Cynthia Diwar

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Hi, I'm Cynthia

What. A. Year. 

In January, I dreamed of travelling to Europe with my parents and visiting Mexico with Mitch for our 2nd Anniversary. My family loves to travel. We always try to travel together at least once a year – it’s kind of a tradition we do since I was a little kid. 

And then a pandemic happened and none of my travel plans actually took place. I know, COVID-19 has put many of us in situations that are far more stressful and overwhelming than my silly travel delay. And for that, I’m grateful. 

While I never imagined the world would be going through a global pandemic, and with all the restrictions and uncertainty, I’ve learned and grown so much this year. We all have. I’ve seen friends doing their best to adapt to their new normal and clients pivoting and dealing with cancellations. Oh, restaurant owners – my heart really goes out to you.

And as the year is coming to an end, it got me thinking: How can I end this year with joy and hope even though all I want to do is to escape it all and pretend things aren’t THAT hard? 

To be honest, things really aren’t bad in my life. My business really took off this year and that allowed Mitch to quit his job and build his own online business as a fitness coach. And I love my marriage so really I should have no reason to “complain” or feel down. So why am I still feeling this way? Why do I feel like it’s only a matter of time that nothing good will ever happen to me again? 

Somehow I have this version of God as someone who withholds good things from me as if the goodness of God is stored in those sciency bottles we see in sci-fi movies. Each of us has our own bottle with our name on it. Once the “good potion” runs out, it runs out, so I better prepare myself and do whatever I can to make it happen…whatever that “it” is.

I’ve been so busy chasing more, even when my soul is desperately craving less. 

Less noise. Less distractions. Less doing, more becoming. 

What about you? Do you feel like life is all too much, yet too little sometimes? You’re not alone. 

LOOKING AHEAD AND MOVING FORWARD WITH GRACE 

Writing this post has affirmed for me that good things can happen even when the circumstances tell you otherwise. I am still in the process of figuring out exactly how to truly embrace the beauty of having less when our world is screaming for more. Perhaps this will mean more blog posts related to faith and honest conversations and less how-to stuff in this corner. Regardless, I’ll keep you posted!

Listening to the song “King of My Heart” also gives me hope and assurance. It’s my all time favourite worship song. The chorus says “You are good, good”. I realize how simple the line is, but rarely do I actually believe it or at least, remember it. While we cannot control our circumstances, there is one thing that will never change and will always be true, and that is the goodness of God.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23:6

That’s his promise to us, my friend! His goodness is limitless. And his love never runs out. 

Looking back, 2020 was a lot. You may feel like 2020 is not a year that is worth remembering or celebrating because (fill in the blank) has not happened. Or you may feel that 2020 has been a terrible year and you never want to think about it again because X,Y,Z happened. Either way, I hope you’re able to find good things, embrace the imperfect journey, and know that you’re seen and loved.

Cheers to 2021!

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